Patience: Now and Forever
by BitterEloquence
Summary: G1: When Hound committed to this relationship, he knew things would not be easy. With trouble and uncertainty beginning to plague his relationship with Mirage, the scout comes to learn the true depth of his patience. Hound/Mirage
1. Patience: Now

Notes: Thanks to my tireless beta yankeesailor for beta'ing and for helping to reassure this very uncertain author that her smutt-scenes do not in fact suck. Also, this is dedicated for naggingfishwife for her amazing Hound/Mirage artwork and for asking for more for this pairing. They're my crusade pairing and I luff them so!  
Additional Notes: This will contain adult situations of the adult themes of the plug'n'play variety, you have been warned. Also, some healthy doses of WAFF and saccharine.  
Disclaimer: Not mine, nor am I making any money off of it. The only thing I own are the twisted ideas floating around in my head.

Continuity: Takes place after **Works in Mysterious Ways **but before **Mine**

* * *

_Patience: A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue_.

--Ambrose Bierce

They had been taking things slow for a while now. Each had been a little shy and uncertain how exactly to go about approaching the subject of interfacing. Whenever they got to a certain level of intimacy, Mirage always pulled back. Something was bothering the spy though he could not articulate it properly to the scout.

It could be frustrating at times but Hound was patient and didn't push him. He didn't like being pushed away but Hound had come into this relationship realizing Mirage had some pretty significant issues. That didn't bother him, what upset him was the haunted, almost panicked look in Mirage's optics when he pulled away. And it kind of… hurt… that Mirage didn't trust him enough to at least give him an honest reason for his seemingly irrational fear. Hound's mind all too eagerly supplied possible explanations and each were unpleasant and horrifying.

They were in Mirage's quarters as usual with a human movie playing in the background--though neither was giving it much attention. The spy's rank gave him the privilege of not having a roommate and that gave the two of them the privacy they wouldn't have gotten in Hound's quarters. Trailbreaker was pretty understanding but Hound doubted he wanted to come in and find his friend interfacing with Mirage on the recharge berth. Not that there was much interfacing going on, of course. Like always, just as Hound started to stroke the panel where Mirage's datacable was stored, the spy panicked and jerked away.

"I'm sorry…"

"No, no, it's alright," Hound tried to sooth him and stroked a hand down Mirage's arm. "Too fast?"

The spy felt absolutely awful. Hound had been nothing but patient with him, but he knew this constant up-and-down was getting old. Frag, he himself was getting tired of this seemingly endless cycle of irrational fear and keen sense of wanting. Primus knew Mirage wanted to drop his guard and let Hound into that intimate part of himself, but every time they tried, unpleasant memories and harsher words resurfaced until any hint of ardor was extinguished.

"I'm sorry, Hound."

"What's the matter, Mirage? Why can't you tell me?"

He couldn't force himself to meet the green mech's optics. "I'm fine, I just don't want to rush things and end up slagging it up."

Hound knew he was lying but also knew it was pointless to press him. Mirage knew more about keeping secrets than Hound could ever hope to know so he had to settle for just backing off and giving Mirage time to come around on his own. "It's fine, really. Take all the time you need," the scout smiled that sweet little smile of his and kissed Mirage softly. "So long as I'm still allowed to do this, I'm happy."

The Ligier made a soft noise and leaned up to kiss Hound sweetly before the two mechs settled back into a companionable silence as they turned back to the movie. Hound would occasionally reach out to stroke Mirage's armor. He was a tactile mech in general and got a private thrill in being allowed to touch the standoffish spy.

Once the movie was over, Hound turned to Mirage and was surprised to see the spy had actually fallen asleep with his head nestled against the crook of Hound's shoulder while sitting up. The jeep smiled softly and just studied that passive face now that it was relaxed and unguarded. It always surprised him to realize how vulnerable Mirage looked whenever his customary aloof expression melted away in recharge. The spy put off such an air of solitary confidence that it was hard to imagine him being emotionally vulnerable.

But at times like these, Hound saw something deeper in Mirage that endeared the Ligier to him all the more. He shifted enough to gently brush his fingers across the graceful line of Mirage's cheek before nestling the blue mech closer. They'd no doubt online with stiff tension lines and aches in their joints from recharging in such a weird position, but Hound found he didn't mind the prospect so much. Not if he got to spend the night with Mirage in his arms.

* * *

As he suspected, Hound woke up stiff and aching. He and Mirage exchange sweetly shy smiles as each prepared to head for their separate patrols. It had been surprisingly homey and filled each with a warm glow of contentment to watch the other prepare to go on duty. Hound even helped Mirage shoulder his electro-disrupter on. His hands lingered over the catches and stroked the struts leading up to Mirage's neck.

The spy leaned into the touch with a contented noise and his optics slowly dimmed in pleasure. When Hound started to ghost soft little kisses across the electro-disrupter and Mirage's shoulders, he could almost let himself pretend that they could stay like this forever. All the fear and uncertainty that haunted him in the night drained away and he could just bask in Hound's warm, soothing, attention.

"Mnn… keep that up and we're both going to be late, " Mirage murmured with reluctance as his hands rose to cover Hound's in a gentle grip.

"Might be worth it," Hound murmured into his audio sensor, the unseen smile easily conveyed in his tone. He pressed up against Mirage and wound his arms around the slim Ligier's shoulders from behind in an intimate hug.

"I'm sure it would be, but we don't want to get a reputation. Besides, Jazz is clever enough to guess what detained me." Amusement colored the noble-mech's voice, though he did shift to lean his cheek against Hound's briefly.

Just then, Hound's comm chimed and he reluctantly released Mirage. "Hound here."

"Hey, just checking to see if you were online," Trailbreaker's deep voice came over the line. His concern touched Hound and he smiled softly with affection for his best friend.

"We're awake, thanks for the reminder, 'Breaker."

"Good, see you in a 'click." Trailbreaker cut the connection and Hound turned to Mirage with a chagrined look.

"Guess that's my cue to skeedattle, huh?"

"So it would seem. I'll see you tonight, okay?"

"Right, see you then." He pulled Mirage close for one last heated kiss that dragged on for a pleasant moment. "Something to think about," the green mech murmured with a mischievous grin before he turned and left Mirage's quarters.

Trailbreaker was waiting for him outside and waved at the Jeep when he came into view. "Looks like it's going to be a gorgeous day today," the defensive strategist pointed out conversationally.

"Yeah, sure does. So long as we don't run into any 'cons it'll be a great patrol." Hound clapped his friend on the shoulder before sinking into his alt mode. Trailbreaker followed suit and the two took off down the road to reach their patrol boundary.

Once they'd gotten far enough into the rugged desert and Trailbreaker was sure no one was around he commed Hound on their private channel. "So, you didn't come home last night. I take it that means you and Mirage have worked out your… err… differences?" he asked curiously. Trailbreaker was proud that he managed to keep his communication modulated and nonchalant.

The defensive strategist had been in love with his best friend for years, though he'd never quite had the courage to tell Hound. He'd kept hoping the Jeep would open his optics one day and recognize Trailbreaker's love for him, but the scout had remained oblivious. And then Mirage had stepped into the picture and taken away any chance Trailbreaker had at gaining Hound's affection.

He tried to not hold it against the spy. If nothing else, Mirage seemed to make Hound happy, and that was enough for the large black mech. Besides, when compared to the graceful noblemech, Trailbreaker was seriously lacking. No one in their right mind would choose the lumbering defensive strategist over a mech like Mirage.

Hound was quiet for a long moment before he sighed. It was an idiosyncrasy he'd picked up from the humans somewhere along the way. "No, not really. I don't know what to do, 'Breaker." The Jeep seemed to sink down on his struts in dejection.

"Has he told you why he keeps pulling away?" It pained him to offer relationship advice to Hound, but his friend's happiness came over his own petty feelings so Trailbreaker tried to ignore the stab of pain he felt in his spark and did what he could to support his friend. If he couldn't be with him as a lover, the least he could do was stand by him as a friend should.

"No, he keeps trying to tell me he's fine. But he's _not_! You haven't seen the fear in his optics, Trailbreaker," The frustration in Hound's voice was something he'd never voice to Mirage. There were some things he could only tell his best friend. And Trailbreaker always seemed to understand. His friendship had helped Hound through many a dark day and he valued the black mech's friendship almost more than anything else.

"I think something truly terrible happened to him. Something that's got him so scared he just panics the moment I touch his dataport," he whispered in a subdued tone.

"Aw, Hound," Trailbreaker rolled to a stop and transformed. The Jeep followed suit and just looked at his friend with a look of fearful knowing. "It'll be alright, Hound. You just gotta have patience with 'em."

"I think someone hurt him, Trailbreaker… like… like that…" It was painful to force those words out but he felt a little better when he got that weight off his shoulders.

Trailbreaker rocked back on his treads pensively. "Maybe. I dunno, Hound," he finally admitted. The spark-breaking look on Hound's face was finally too much and he stepped forward to envelope the smaller mech in a hug. "Shhh. Just be patient with him and he'll come around, Hound. He'd be a fool not to." As always, Trailbreaker assumed his position of making the situation lighter.

Hound returned the hug with a shudder. "I think I love him, 'Breaker."

Trailbreaker's optic visor flashed in pain, though Hound missed it. His arms just tightened about the tracker. "I know, Hound, I know."

* * *

When they returned to the Ark that night, Hound tried to hail Mirage but was surprised when he couldn't reach the spy.

"I'm thinking about going to explore those canyons we found a couple weeks ago, you want to come?"

Hound shook his head regretfully. "I'd love to, 'Breaker, but Mirage and I sorta had some plans."

"Oh." Disappointment colored the black mech's voice. "Well, if you change your mind you know where I'll be," Trailbreaker offered cheerfully.

"Yeah, thanks. Maybe we'll go this weekend?" Hound felt a little guilty. Ever since he'd started seeing Mirage, he hadn't been spending as much time with Trailbreaker. The scout knew how lonely the defensive strategist was beneath his happy visage. Trailbreaker's lack of confidence made him almost painfully shy around the Autobots at times and he needed constant reassurance from Hound--otherwise he tended to settle into a depressed funk.

The scout knew that was why Trailbreaker had continued to bunk with him even after a room had become available to the tactician. He was of high enough rank to merit a single bunk, but Trailbreaker had continued to stay with Hound claiming it was just easier that way. "I'll talk to Prowl and see if I can't clear a whole weekend for us. We'll go out exploring, just the two of us."

"Hey, sounds like fun. Can't wait!" Enthused, Trailbreaker waved goodbye to his friend and went back down the road. Hound smiled as he watched his friend go before he turned and walked into the Ark. He tried Mirage's quarters but didn't get an answer.

Understandably concerned, the scout checked the commissary but didn't find Mirage there either. Finally, he approached Red Alert's security room and knocked on the door. "Hey, Red Alert? You in there?"

Like he wouldn't be. The twitchy Lamborghini rarely left his security room unless he was on patrol or in battle… or distracted by Inferno. Not that Hound was supposed to know about that. Of course, their relationship was the most well-known secret on the whole Ark so it didn't really count.

The vid-screen placed on the wall flickered to life to reveal the impatient-looking mech. "What did you need, Hound? I'm kind of busy at the moment."

"You seen Mirage anywhere? We were supposed to do something tonight but I can't seem to find him."

Red Alert's lip components thinned slightly. "That information is classified."

"What? Oh come off it, Red Alert. Just a simple yes or no would suffice." Hound felt a rare flash of annoyance flicker through him. Sometimes he could have sworn Red Alert made things difficult just because he liked to watch everyone dance around to his tune. Petty fragger that he was.

"It's classified, sorry." He didn't sound sorry. He didn't sound apologetic in the least. Fragger.

Hound felt his jaw tighten and he opened his mouth to retort.

"Hound." Prowl must have been taking lessons from Jazz on sneaking around, as he nearly scared the spark out of Hound. "Come with me, please."

"Yes, sir." Hound shot an annoyed look at Red Alert's view screen before placidly trudging after the tactician.

Instead of leading Hound to his office like the scout would have expected, the Datsun walked into officer country and lead Hound to his own personal quarters. "Umnn… sir?" Understandably wary, Hound looked around nervously.

"It's alright. I just wanted to speak to you in private and Red Alert knows I'll shoot him if he dares spy inside my personal quarters," Prowl said with a small smirk that sent a chill running through Hound.

A personable Prowl was a scary, scary Prowl.

"Right…" The skittish scout followed the tactician inside and looked around with barely leashed curiosity. It wasn't often a grunt like himself got to see how the other side lived, so to speak. He'd never been inside officers' quarters and was kind of surprised to see they weren't that much different from Hound's. They were the size of Hound's double, though there was only one berth which did give Prowl some extra room.

He'd been expecting the quarters to be cold and sterile much like Mirage's were, but he was surprised to see splashes of color and personality. A vase of brightly colored marbles and shiny rocks sat on the desk and twinkled merrily in the overhead light.

"It's Jazz's," Prowl explained with a wry look. "He's got a thing for shiny objects."

Hound went still. He had no idea Prowl and Jazz shared these quarters. Wait… only one recharge berth. The green Jeep's optics widened and he looked over at Prowl with surprised disbelief on his face.

The Datsun merely shrugged and smiled a chagrined little smile. "I realize I'm probably not the best suited mech to be talking to you about this, but let's just say I have some experience with being in love with a Special Ops member."

The whole evening had taken a surreal twist.

"They're a unique breed, Special Ops agents that is," Prowl continued. He picked up a human-sized snow-globe delicately. "You can't be in that unit and not have some very strange personality quirks. Some like Jazz and Bumblebee are better at hiding it, at pretending to be normal. I think most of the Autobots couldn't even picture little Bumblebee taking down a full-sized mech. They're dangerous, I suppose you could say. And secretive. By Primus can they keep their secrets." Prowl shook his head and the bemused exasperation was visible on the normally neutral-looking tactician. "Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"Err… not really, sir. What does this have to do with me?" Hound tried to pretend he didn't know where this was headed. Mirage had expressed a desire to keep their relationship a secret and Hound intended to keep that secret.

"Red Alert isn't the only one who knows everything that goes on around this base, you know." Prowl reminded him with a hint of his normal icy, hard-nosed attitude coloring his voice. "The command element knows. We don't disapprove per se, in case you were curious. But Optimus and I always like to keep a close eye on the Special Ops mechs. If only because their lifestyle leaves them more open to breakdowns--even a few psychotic episodes with some of our old recruits."

"O-Oh." What could you say to that? The very concept was kind of creepy. If Optimus and the command element kept such close tabs on their troops, how did the likes of Sideswipe and even Jazz pull off all the pranks and practical jokes without getting caught?

Oh.

"Red Alert's monitoring systems must be more sophisticated then he lets on."

"Yes, well, his continual griping is only partly an act. To Red Alert's optics, even our current system isn't adequate," the tactician admitted wryly. "But that is neither here nor there. I just wanted to give you a little insight into how Special Ops agents work. They're cagey and extremely careful about who they put their trust in. But when you gain that trust, you can count on them to be there for you. I think it might be something in their programming, or maybe the specialized training that they're put through."

Prowl paced around restlessly and Hound realized he was nervous! How strange to think that the seemingly unflappable tactician could get nervous. Of course, from what Hound understood of Prowl, the Datsun was not comfortable dealing with emotions and illogical things like feelings. "I see, thanks."

"Do you?" Prowl slanted a look at him. "If you're looking for a lover who's going to be open and accepting then you're looking at the wrong mech. It took Jazz almost an entire vorn to even fully commit to a relationship with me, and he's downright normal compared to some of Mirage's neuroses."

The scout felt irritation begin to swell within him. "I know that, and I'm not looking for some quick lay or a casual berth-mate." The defensive tone in Hound's voice had Prowl staring at him long and hard. His door-wings flicked briefly in a shrug.

"I just wanted to be sure you knew what you're getting into. I don't have all the details of his life before he joined the Autobots but logically, he shows all the signs of lasting trauma. He just shows them in a different way from, say, Bluestreak."

Prowl set the snow-globe down where he'd found it and turned his attention back to Hound. "He refuses to even think about talking to Smokescreen. Not that I can blame him." That last part was muttered almost too low for Hound to hear him. Prowl's suspicion of the divisionary tactician was well known. They did not see optic-to-optic on anything. In this, Hound found himself agreeing with Prowl. For all his genial attitude and sunny smiles, there was something dark that lurked beneath Smokescreen's surface. But Optimus trusted him and that was enough for Hound.

"I… umn… thanks for the heads up, I appreciate it." Strange and unsolicited though it was.

"You're welcome. Jazz and Mirage should be back later tonight. I'll have Jazz pass along to Mirage that you were looking for them. They're in comm blackout right now."

"I… see." Hound wondered if he'd ever be able to regain the ability to speak in full sentences. Everything Prowl had revealed was swirled around inside his head like a whirlwind and it made it hard to concentrate on one thing at a time. "Hey, Prowl?"

"Hmmn?" The second-in-command had picked up a data-pad and was looking it over.

"How did you… er… get Jazz to come around?"

"Oh, I had to tie him up and have my way with him until he saw reason." he murmured in an off-handed way, optics never leaving the data-pad.

He missed Hound's jaw dropping to the floor.

"I… I… s-see." Flustered, the Jeep took a step back.

"If you think it'll be helpful, you can borrow my cuffs," Prowl reached into a subspace compartment and pulled out a set of energon-cuffs.

Hound made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a squeak. "N-No! That's okay, I don't think that's necessary!" Thoroughly horrified now, Hound beat a hasty retreat. He missed the sly, calculating smirk that crossed Prowl's lips as the door slid shut.

Non-coms… heh… Jazz was rubbing off on him.


	2. Patience: Forever

Warnings: P'n'P ahead. And an overabundance of teeth-achingly sweet fluff.

* * *

_I never thought it was worth it, you know waiting for your love, and then I felt your kiss, I could wait forever for this_.

--Unknown

It was close to midnight Earth time when Hound's communications channel chimed and let him know he had an incoming message. He onlined groggy and disoriented but answered the comm out of habit. "'ello?"

"Hound?" Mirage's concerned voice came over the line and helped the tracker shake the last bit of grogginess. "Are you alright? I was told to contact you."

"Oh, no, everything is alright. Prowl shouldn't have disturbed you." A quick check of his chronometer told Hound what time it was and he crawled off the recharge berth with a grimace. Two nights of improper recharge were beginning to play havoc with his systems.

"Hound? Ev'rything alright?" Trailbreaker slurred tiredly.

"It's fine, 'Breaker. Sorry for interrupting your cycle." Guiltily, Hound let himself out of his quarters.

"I should let you get back to recharge." There was a strange note in Mirage's voice.

"No, no, I'm online. Where are you?"

"On my way back to my quarters. Just got back from patrol."

"Alright, I'll come to you. There's something I want to talk to you about."

"Very well, I'll get you a cube while I'm in the commissary."

"That'd be real nice, thank you," the green mech smiled at Mirage's thoughtfulness. Not many mechs got to see the spy's conscientious and solicitous side. By the time Hound was approaching Mirage's quarters, the blue mech was coming from the opposite direction with two cubes of energon held in his hands. There was a glistening sheen to the Ligier's chassis that told Hound he'd taken a recent trip to the wash-racks. The shadowed and subdued color of Mirage's optics told Hound the mission had not gone as planned and it was all he could do to not sweep Mirage up into a hug right there on a spot.

"Hey," he settled for a shy smile which Mirage returned wanly.

"Hi." Mirage held out one cube for Hound to take so he could enter the code for his quarters. Hound politely averted his optics. There was a nervous sort of tension surrounding the two mechs but that didn't stop Hound from following Mirage into the spy's quarters.

"You okay?" he asked gently as he set the cube down and reached to relieve Mirage of his. Once both cubes had been set aside, the tracker stepped forward to envelope the slender mech in a hug. Hound was pleased to feel Mirage immediately relax into the embrace.

The blue mech cycled air through his vents slowly and let his forehead rest against Hound's windshield. He loved the quiet energy that seemed to surround the green mech. Just being close to Hound seemed to help ease some of the uncertainties and everyday stress that nagged at the back of his processor. The fact that Hound just held him without attempting to do anything else just endeared the sweet scout to him even more. "Thank you," Mirage breathed.

"You're welcome. Long day, I take it?"

"Dreadfully," the spy admitted with a weary smile. He pulled away from Hound's arms and moved to pick up the energon cube. He downed it quickly and barely even grimaced at the taste of bland mid-grade.

Hound chuckled and handed Mirage his cube. "I think you need it more than me," he assured the spy. "You look really depleted."

Mirage shot him a wry grin but gratefully drank that cube as well. "Thanks, it's just been a long day."

"I can tell," Hound stepped up behind the Ligier and his gentle hands moved to undo the latches to Mirage's electro-disrupter. The gentle intimacy of the gesture made Mirage's spark stutter for a moment. Suddenly, he could clearly imagine onlining ever morning to Hound laying beside him, to the scout helping him adorn his bulky cloaking device. It was a beautiful fantasy and one he realized he wanted more than he wanted his next taste of energon.

Once Hound had set the delicate piece of machinery aside, he turned around only to be met with Mirage's lips as the spy suddenly kissed him hungrily. The Jeep made a surprised noise and stumbled back against the wall as Mirage continued to kiss him. The Ligier's graceful hands traveled all over Hound's body and caused the scout to shudder. Weeks of carefully repressed desire suddenly welled up within him and Hound took a more active roll in the kiss. He began kissing Mirage just as hungrily, just as desperately, and it was his hands that were mapping out the blue mech's various hot spots. Hound was a patient mech but in that moment, all he wanted was more. Like a greedy Sparkling he reached out with both hands and took as much as he could without bothering to take the time to truly relish it.

Logic warred with desire and there was a quiet voice at the back of Hound's mind screaming at him to slow down. Mirage seemed to be just as reckless and intent on crashing headlong into this thing. Doubts and fears clamored and threatened to overwhelm him but the Ligier just pretended like he could ignore it and it would go away.

Finally, they had to break away and cycle air through their vents raggedly. "We should slow down," Hound ground out, his voice hoarse with need.

"I don't want to," Mirage whispered. "I want you, Hound." There was something almost spark-breakingly vulnerable in Mirage's optics as he said those words.

Hound wanted nothing more than to draw Mirage back in for another kiss. By Primus did he want that. But he couldn't ignore the whisper of doubt circling around at the back of his mind. "No, wait." Pitspawn, it cost him to put the put the brakes on this. "I don't think I can handle seeing you pull away again, Mirage. We need to face whatever is bothering you. Together." His hand sought out Mirage's and the tracker's larger fingers laced with the former noblemech's.

"I… it is so stupid," the spy finally admitted shamefully.

"What?" Hound prompted gently. His free hand rose to rest tenderly against Mirage's cheek. "Tell me, please? I swear I won't hold it against you."

A pained expression passed fleetingly across Mirage's faceplates. "I'm… I'm not very good at… that… I didn't want to disappoint you."

"What? Mirage, where on Cybertron did you get such a ridiculous idea?" the green mech looked puzzled. "You're amazing."

"No, I'm not." He was all but visibly pulling away. As was his habit, Mirage began to emotionally detach himself from the situation before he got hurt.

"Are you kidding me? Mirage, if that were the case I wouldn't be half-mad with the need to touch you. To kiss you. Slag, just be _with_ you." He released Mirage's hand so he could use both of them to cup the aristocrat's face gently and turn those shamed optics back to his own. "I don't know where you got an idea like that but I can assure you that you're doing _fine_." A wry, gleam filled Hound's optics.

Mirage still looked troubled and unconvinced. He genuinely wanted to believe Hound but he'd spent years tying himself up in knots over this. His first lover 'Haze had only interfaced with him once before proclaiming Mirage was the worst aft he'd ever had and that the noblemech was colder than day-old slag. To a young and impressionable mech like Mirage., it had been crushing. He'd been in love with Mindhaze but the other noblemech had coldly turned him aside and declared he had no interest in boring and stiff interfaces from the likes of Mirage.

After that, Mirage had never interfaced with someone he cared about. Emotionless, stress-releasing bouts of interfacing were one thing but the cold aristocrat had never let anyone close enough to hurt him ever again.

No one until Hound, that was.

"Mirage, please, trust me on this? I'm willing to give you whatever time you need to be comfortable with me, but don't cheat us both out of this over something like self-consciousness."

"I don't want to frag this up just because I'm terrible on the recharge berth."

"That's not going to happen."

"Yes, it could." Mirage jerked back from Hound's hands and took a few steps back as his arms crossed over his chest in a self-conscious gesture.

The pieces were beginning to fall into place inside Hound's mind. Suddenly, Mirage's strange aversion to intimacy was beginning to make sense. "Where is the fragger that hurt you?" he demanded fiercely. "Because by Primus I'll—"

Mirage held up one finger to his lip components, effectively quieting Hound. "It doesn't matter, he's been deactivated for a long time. He went down with the Towers."

That only seemed to mildly placate the Jeep, though he did stop talking and even kissed the finger pressed to his lips. Mirage smiled and pulled his hand away so he could brush his lips against Hound's. "I told you, it's stupid. I don't know why I'm letting it bother me after all this time."

"Because someone you cared about said something unbelievably cruel to you. But I'm not that person, Mirage. I would _never_ say something like that, you know that. Don't you?" It hurt to think that Mirage couldn't distinguish him from this fragger. It brought up all kinds of uncomfortable questions about whether or not Mirage trusted him, whether or not he ever _would_ trust him.

"Yes, I do!" the spy protested immediately. "I know you would never do that, but it's… it's hard," he finished lamely.

"I'm trying to understand that too--I am. And like I said, I'll give you as much time as you need, 'raj." He let the affectionate nickname slip on accident but the former noblemech didn't seem to mind all that much. He just smiled weakly and moved to wrap his arms around Hound again.

"That's just it. I do want you, Hound. Primus, but the wondering and waiting has been killing me."

"Then what do you want to do, Mirage?" Hound knew his voice was hoarse and rough but he'd been walking a narrow line between desire and patience for weeks now. No doubt other mechs would have pushed Mirage to complete that particular aspect of their relationship but Hound just wasn't one of those mechs.

But that didn't mean he didn't have the same needs and desires as everyone else. And after running hot then cold for a few weeks, even his vaunted control was beginning to strain.

The Ligier looked so uncomfortable and torn, it broke poor Hound's spark. They were on a precipice here, with either side a seemingly endless chasm. Both were uncomfortable and afraid to make the first move, so they just stood there looking at one another uncertainly.

"Do you trust me, Mirage?" Hound finally asked. It was a loaded question and he knew it. After his little 'talk' with Prowl, the tracker was beginning to realize how precarious such a bond of trust could be. Special Ops could not afford to give their trust easily. Jazz had Prowl and Bumblebee had his strange friendship with the human Spike but Mirage… Mirage had no one. And hadn't had anyone for a long while, Hound was willing to bet.

"Y-Yes," the tremulous answer finally came. Mirage grimaced briefly, twisting those pale, aristocratic features into a pained mask.

"Then come here." Hound caught one slender hand and tugged the spy towards the recharge berth. "We'll start slow. This sort of thing should be slow… savored." His voice seemed to deepen an octave as he purred that last word. The way Mirage's optics darkened told Hound that he'd appreciated that rough little whisper.

Mirage didn't fight him as Hound pulled him onto the recharge berth and rolled them so they were laying side-by-side on its slightly narrow confines. It was big enough for one mech to lay there comfortably but was a bit small for two full-sized mechs. At that moment, Hound didn't pay attention to the way the edge of the berth dug into his back seat. All that mattered right now was making sure Mirage was comfortable.

The spy ended up laying half on his back because of the protrusions from his front end, but the slightly shy smile he gave Hound was enough to tell the Jeep it was okay to touch him. "Now, I ain't the most knowledgeable of mechs when it comes to these kinds of things, but it's usually customary to explore a bit and found out what makes your lover's engine turn over. So you just lay there and let me touch you for a bit." The green mech said this with a wide grin. He obviously didn't need to school Mirage on the nuances of interfacing but he couldn't resist the urge to be playful. Besides, he'd wanted free-access to explore the spy's body since the first time they'd kissed.

"So I'm just supposed to lay here and be passive while you have all the fun?" Mirage challenged with a cocked eye-ridge.

"Naw, you can touch too," Hound teased right back as one large hand skimmed the line of Mirage's front end. "But I want to pleasure you."

"I want to pleasure you too." This was said with a slightly rebellious look.

"Oh trust me, I'll get plenty of pleasure out of this. Just imagining the noises you're going to make causes my engine to turn over."

Mirage's optics darkened even more and he let his head fall back to the berth. "Fine. But only if I get to return the favor afterwards."

Hound's chuckle rumbled in the air and he dropped his head to kiss Mirage briefly. "It's a promise."

"Good." And with that, Mirage let him explore to his spark's content. Hound started on his front, sensitive fingers testing out the formula-1 racer's chassis. The spy made his first soft, whimpering noise when Hound's fingers were exploring struts on his shoulders. Mirage squirmed a bit when Hound's blunt-fingered hand toyed with the area around his wheel and the joint. A knowing smile slowly spread across Hound's face. When the Jeep's fingers found the shallow depression at the base of Mirage's throat, the Ligier gasped and reached up to grab Hound's hand.

"Too fast?" Hound asked and dropped a kiss to the spot he'd been touching just moments before.

"N-no, it's fine, please continue." Mirage's voice, normally so cultured and modulated, sounded hoarse and weak. Hound was slowly moving his way down the spy's body and he was being very thorough in his explorations. His secondary function of mapping out terrain was suddenly coming in handy and he treated each and every new inch he explored as something to be worshiped and memorized.

Unbeknownst to Mirage, the scout was building a mental image of the spy inside his memory banks that would stay with him the rest of his life. Hound eventually traveled down the length of Mirage's body and was tracing the number twenty-six on Mirage's chest when the race car's engine grew in pitch. The revving of his engine only grew louder when Hound's fingers began to toy with the sensitive wings curving up from Mirage's sides. They were especially sensitive and all but reduced the blue mech to a puddle of needy desire.

Dark hands scrabbled for Hound's shoulders and slipped off when the Ligier's body spasmed. "Hound…" The cry was ripped from Mirage and sounded nothing like the normally composed spy. "Oh sweet Primus!" he cried out as Hound's hand slipped beneath his body and scraped across the inside of his cockpit. Shudders ran through Mirage's frame and the green mech could feel the vibrations of the formula-1's engine revving from its place in Mirage's back.

By now, the large green mech was settled between Mirage's legs and he tried not to wince when the spy's ankle and lower wheels suddenly kicked him. Judging by the gasping noise he got, Hound knew he'd done something right. He lifted his mouth from one of Mirage's wings to watch the former aristocrat's faceplates as he raced towards overload. The first of many, if Hound had any say in the matter.

"That's it. Just let go, Mirage. I've got you," he purred and smiled at the mixture of confusion and dark need that had deepened Mirage's optics to cobalt. The finely tuned racer's engine screamed and all but drowned out the spy's cry when he red-lined and reached overload. Those slim, graceful fingers that Hound was so fond of left dents in the scout's shoulder armor when Mirage clenched down on him in the heat of the moment. That minor pain was nothing compared to the amazingly erotic sight of watching the normally composed noblemech completely loose control as he let himself experience the myriad of sensations racing through his body.

Hound groaned in sympathy and pressed his hot cheek to the cool metal of Mirage's inner thigh. His own engine was rumbling unsteadily within his chest. There was something undeniably erotic about being able to bring the spy to overload with just the touch of his hands. His hand was still resting inside the Ligier's cockpit and he stroked the leather seat there softly. Instead of making Mirage's engines rev this time around, it seemed to sooth him and the spy finally onlined his optics again to grin tiredly at the scout.

"Wow."

"I'll say," Hound agreed with a rumbling laugh. He slowly moved his frame up Mirage's body, metal and glass scraping teasingly as he drifted up to capture the spy's lips for a long kiss. "That was just…"

"Wow," Mirage completed with a chuckle.

"Well, I was going to say incredible but 'wow' works too."

The blue mech laughed and nipped Hound's lower lip in revenge but Hound didn't seem to mind and even managed a low sound of pleasure.

"Ready to continue?" he asked with a grin. Mirage looked a little wary but nodded. He didn't know what Hound had planned but if things so far were anything to judge by, it couldn't be all that bad. "Relax, it'll be okay." Hound coaxed gently and kissed Mirage once more. They kissed and explored for a few breems as the scout tried to work Mirage into that warm, hazy space between desire and reality.

Mirage discovered Hound's pulley system was especially sensitive and spent a long while exploring that and wringing strangled sounds from the green Jeep.

"Please…" Hound moaned though he was too incoherent to finish the sentence. Mirage shuddered and let his forehead rest against Hound's windshield. "Please, Mirage. Oh Primus…"

Mirage wondered if this was how Hound had felt when he brought him to overload. There was something heady and powerful about being able to reduce your lover to a shaking, incoherent mess.

"Please," Hound whispered and turned those dark and impassioned optics on the blue mech. Mirage knew what he wanted and he looked down at where Hound's fingers were tracing the outline of the spy's data-port.

"Alright," Mirage sucked air through his intakes and brushed Hound's fingers aside so he could uncoil his data-cable. The spy whose hands had never shaken in battle suddenly found even the most basic manual dexterity escaping him. He held his data-cable with trembling fingers and tried to find Hound's data-port but couldn't quite line the connectors up. Mirage fumbled for a few more astroclicks until he finally managed to line them up and jacked himself into Hound's systems. The display popped up telling him his systems were syncing with Hound's.

Mirage hissed when he felt the tracker complete the connection on his end and suddenly they were initializing the data transfer. Their systems were fully synced and Mirage immediately started to get feedback and echoes from Hound. The tracker deliberately let him past his guards and firewalls, letting the spy have free access to his whole being. It was humbling and a little scary at the same time. No one had ever exposed themselves to him like Hound was and Mirage started to pull away both mentally and physically.

"Please…" dark green arms tightened around him. _ 'Don't go, don't run away from me, please.'_ Hound continued over the bridge between them. _'You're so amazing, I don't know how I lived without this for so long.' _

Every fiber of Mirage's being cried out as a wave of warmth and love washed through the link. It was amazing and spark-breaking at the same time. He was surprised to feel himself echo that tentative connection and thought. It was getting hard to tell where he stopped and Hound began. Their minds and sparks seemed to overlap and blend better than anyone else Mirage had ever encountered.

The pleasure was all consuming and as Mirage and Hound reached overload together, the spy saw a flash of how Hound viewed him and was floored. _'He thinks I'm that beautiful? That desirable?'_ a part of Mirage's mind questioned in awe. That was the last thought he had as overload washed through him and painted the world around them both white with static.

* * *

Mirage onlined feeling lethargic and drained. When he powered up his optics, he found Hound smiling at him from where he sat curled up on his side. He had one arm curled under his head and was resting his cheek there while the other was ghosting feather-soft caresses across the back of Mirage's hand.

"Welcome back to the world of the online and functioning," Hound teased.

"Hmn… how long was I out?" He checked his internal chronometer and was surprised to realize he'd been recharging for almost five breems. "I guess I was more depleted then I thought."

"Well, it has been a long day. Here, drink a little energon and you'll feel better." Hound reached down and picked up a discarded cube of energon from the floor. Mirage could see that half of it had already been imbibed so he accepted it with little guilt. Hound was the type to sacrifice his own comfort for others so it relieved the spy to see his new lover had already seen to his own needs. "It's not much, kind of stale really but it'll do the job."

"Thanks," Mirage murmured and took a hesitant sip from the cube. It was stale but to his parched and depleted systems it was as sweet as high grade and Mirage greedily drank it down until nothing remained of the iridescent liquid.

"Feeling better now?" Hound teased with a grin.

"Yes, much better, thank you." the spy leaned forward and kissed the scout softly. Hound could still taste the residue of energon on Mirage's lips. He licked that shimmer up and it tingled in his mouth pleasantly when the blue mech pulled away.

They lay there for a while enjoying the quiet companionship. Hound had turned Mirage's hand over so he could play with the spy's palm and fingers idly. Mirage hadn't even realized how sensitive his hands could be until Hound started tracing the seams of his palm and the delicate servos of his fingers.

Hound watched with some amusement as Mirage's optics slowly darkened to a rich cobalt color. "You're so beautiful," he murmured softly.

Surprised, Mirage raised his head to look at him. There was still a shadow of doubt in his optics which Hound hated to see.

"I mean it. You're addicting."

"Hound." The spy was obviously uncomfortable with that kind of praise.

"No, it's true. And I'm going to tell you every day 'til you believe it. Multiple times a day if I need to. And if that doesn't do the trick, I'm going to show you much I want you until you beg for me to stop." Hound's voice had taken on a low, gravely quality that sent tingles through Mirage's chassis. "Now, are you going to believe me or am I going to have to give you another demonstration?"

A ghost of tired amusement flickered through Mirage and he closed his fingers around Hound's to still the tracker's playful teasing. "We should get some recharge. Both of us have to be up for patrol in a few cycles."

"Yeah, we _should_," Hound actually managed to_ leer_! Mirage hadn't known he was capable of such a devious expression.

"Primus help me, I think I've already created a monster." the blue mech bemoaned though there was open mischief on his face as he said that. "A monster with an appetite, it would seem." Mirage laughed as dark fingers sought out green plating.

"Oh, insatiable," Hound agreed and pulled him close once more.


End file.
